Random Question Game

Warning: This journal post contains language that some may find offensive. If swear words bother you, do not read any further. If you are too young to already know any of the swear words contained herein, your parents should be paying more attention to what you are doing on the Internet.

Brandi is the latest winner of the Random Question Game. Her new question to us now is: if you could pick any song that is your favorite or any song that represents you as a person what song would it be? With the song tell me why its your favorite, or how it represents you.

Now, I don't usually take part in too many of these little games and contests that are continually circulating around AOL J-land. I started doing John Scalzi's weekend assignment as a way of pimping my journal more than anything else. I don't do the Thursday three, or the Friday five, or the Saturday seven, or the 101 boring facts about yourself. But, once in a while, one of the winners of this random question game asks something that catches my interest. Such is the case with Brandi's offering.

I can't simply answer the question, "what is your favourite song?" I can't do it for a couple of reasons. One: it's a shallow, adolescent question, and my response is sure to be buried under mountains of Britneys and X-tinas, who wouldn't know deep if they choked on it; or rendered mundane by the occasional pretentious reference to Mozart, or Wagner, answers that would be completely irrelevant to the questioner. Two: there is no way in the seven hells that I could possibly pick just one song as my favourite. I love music, and my CD collection, while small by true collector standards, still numbers about 400 albums. So the question I am going to answer is slightly different. What recent pop song do you like because it has something important to say in today's world? Kinda leaves Britney out of it, doesn't it?

First, let me explain that I am old. OK, not so old that there aren't lots of more experienced folk around, but compared to 80% of the journalers in AOL J-land, I'm frickin' ancient. Gawd, I'm almost 40! The music that is the most vital to me, to this day, is Led Zeppelin, and Black Sabbath, and Rush. Deep Purple, Jimi Hendrix, The Band, the list goes on like that. Those predelictions notwithstanding, the song I am going to propose you bend your attention towards is... (drumrolll please) ...Who Knew, by Eminem. To those of you who now have to clean the coffee off of your monitor screen, I apologize. Sure, Eminem, A.K.A. Marshall Mathers is a foul mouthed, chauvinistic, homophobic little punk, but he's got a lot of important things to say about the role of art in our society; about freedom of speech and freedom of expression; about personal responsibility. I'm sorry again. I should have told you to just leave that coffee on the table.

Who Knew, from Eminem's second album: The Marshall Mathers Album, is a reply to those who criticized him after the release of his first album: The Slim Shady Album. I will not reproduce the lyrics in full here, because, quite frankly, they are obscene. I will quote selected excerpts from the song. While I will censor the profanities that may still appear in the sections I have chosen, as Eminem himself points out in the song, any child who has reached grade three will already be familiar with all of them.

The chorus of Who Knew is the most recognizable part of the song:

I never knew I, knew I would get this big
I never knew I, knew I'd effect this kid
I never knew I'd, get him to slit his wrist
I never knew I'd, get him to hit this bitch

He elaborates in the third verse:

I never knew I.. knew I'd..
have a new house or a new car
A couple years ago I was more poorer than you are...

...How many retards'll listen to me
and run up in the school shootin when they're pissed at a teach-
er, her, him, is it you is it them?
"Wasn't me, Slim Shady said to do it again!"
Damn!  How much damage can you do with a pen?
Man I'm just as f****d up as you woulda been,
if you woulda been in my shoes, who woulda thought
Slim Shady would be somethin that you woulda bought
that woulda made you get a gun and shoot at a cop
I just said it - I didn't know if you'd do it or not.

On the surface, it sounds like a cop out,but it is a valid emotional response. Stardom is thrust upon these performers overnight. They go from singing in underground bars for little more than the glory, and a couple of cases of beer, to selling millions of records, sometimes in only a few short months. The realization that their words carry the power to influence people's actions is always a shock. I remember an episode of WKRP In Cincinnati in which the DeeJay, Dr. Johnny Fever, jokingly tells listeners during a garbage collection strike to drop their garbage on the mayor's front lawn. When hundreds of people follow his suggestion, he has a similar epiphany. The realization of the power of his celebrity strikes him psychosomatically dumb. He becomes unable to utter a single word over the air.

Eminem doesn't stop there, however. In typical street poseur fashion, he goes on the attack:


So who's bringin the guns in this country?
I couldn't sneak a plastic pellet gun through customs over in London
And last week, I seen a Schwarzaneggar movie
Where he's shootin all sorts of these mother******s with a uzi
I see these three little kids, up in the front row,
Screamin "Go," with their 17-year-old Uncle
I'm like, "Guidance - ain't they got the same moms and dads
Who got mad when I asked if they liked violence?"
And told me that my tape taught 'em to swear
What about the make-up you allow your 12-year-old daughter to wear?
So tell me that your son doesn't know any cuss words
When his bus driver's screamin at him, f****n him up worse
And f**k was the first word I ever learned
up in the third grade, flippin the gym teacher the bird

And earlier:

But don't blame me when lil' Eric jumps off of the terrace
You shoulda been watchin him - apparently you ain't parents

Ouch. Personal responsibility is a big issue with me. We seem to be living in a world where people don't take responsibility for their own actions. Among of the most successful businesses going these days are the ex-copper legal services. You got a ticket for speeding? Take it in and the guys who know all of the tricks will get you off. Not prove you innocent of the charge, just figure out a technicality to spring you. If I gat stopped bya cop I say, "yeah, you got me. I was speeding." And I pay the damn ticket. "Yes, but the demerit points will make my insurance go up," I hear you whine. Tough titties! I have a system guaranteed to prevent you from ever receiving another speeding ticket. Stop frickin' speeding! Take responsibility for your actions. But no. Your kid swears? Blame Eminem. Your kid harrasses homosexuals? Blame Eminem. Your kid got his hands on a gun and busted a cap in somebody? Blame Eminem. Blame everyone else but the poor parents. How could it be their fault? They work two jobs each so they can buy the little guy everything he wants. Everything but the attention he so desperately needs. If you'd payed some attention to the kid a couple of years ago when he first dyed his hair and got the nose ring it would never have gone this far. "But there were no warning signs," you say. Yes there were, and if you ever took your nose out of the newspaper, you'd have seen them. And Eminem is letting you hear about it.

The next thing young Mr. Mathers takes on is censorship. Specifically the hypocritical nature of the way censorship is applied. He says:

I'm sorry, there must be a mix-up
You want me to fix up lyrics while the President gets his d**k sucked?

And his recommendation:

F**k that, take drugs, rape sluts
Make fun of gay clubs, men who wear make-up
Get aware, wake up, get a sense of humor
Quit tryin to censor music, this is for your kid's amusement

He's saying no. He's not going to change they way he speaks and raps. He's going to say whatever he wants, and you're going to take it with grain of salt, because really, he's a white rapper. Why would anyone ever take him seriously? He wants us to realize that he's not creating the problem, he's just reporting it. He says the things he says because that's they way he was brought up. Here's the world for you. If you want it, take it, warts and all. The cure for warts is not to just cover them up and stop everybody from talking about them. He's also saying that we should all take responsibility for our own actions. We can't blame Eminem for the bad things we do. And if we're talking about a child too young to have that kind of responsibility...

...he answers that question in another song:

I wouldn't let Hailie (his daughter) listen to me neither.